My Disappearance From the Face of the Internet

About half a year ago, I dropped off the internet without much explanation. A lot of you reached out, asking what was going on and if I was okay. (Don’t worry; I was, and I am.) Anyway, I figured a formal explanation was long due, and I decided to make this out-of-nowhere blog post. Allow me to update you on aspects of my life….

Writing

A lot of you were surprised when I told you that I didn’t feel my life’s calling was writing. I’ve always felt it was a “right now, for now” thing. I never saw it as a career or something I wanted to do long-term. It was more of a hobby.

I still hold that opinion.

After getting a job, I found sitting down at night to reach my word count growing more and more difficult. The words that came out were barely worth keeping. Soon, they became nothing. I kind of let my WIP’s fall to the side, thinking “it’s okay, I’ll keep blogging, and when I’m ready to pick up writing again, I’ll get back to my WIP’s.”

I didn’t.

Rather, even my blogging fell behind track. I wasn’t writing quality content. Everything felt forced. I didn’t have the mental energy to spare. The difference between working full time and being able to write full-time was huge, and eventually I made the decision to take a break.

The relief was immense. Instead of staring at my computer screen every night, trying to force myself to write and feeling guilty hours later when nothing got done, I was able to relax after work, clear my head, and enjoy my free time. I put no limit to my break. As long as I didn’t want to write, I wasn’t going to do it. I would return when I couldn’t resist the pull…whenever that came.

To summarize: I am taking an indefinite break from writing.

Work

I moved to Walmart full-time. I’m only working one job now, and it’s way less stressful what I’d been doing before. I’ve been in OPD (online grocery pickup and delivery) for the past six months. It’s been all right. The job mainly consists of picking orders for people and taking the orders out to cars.

Each has its pros and cons. Picking is fun for a couple of hours, but after that it gets tiring for me. However, that’s only because I speed walk around the entire store and lift multiple totes (baskets of groceries) at once in order to better my pick rate. (They have a leaderboard for the store. The scanner device tracks how many groceries you pick per hour, and the top five people are shown on the leaderboard. I’ve ranked high the past few months…I feel pressured to keep first place and/or beat personal records.)

Dispensing can either be good or bad. I enjoy the work better, but the sun makes me avoid it, since I get heat exhaustion easily. (It’s actually common; numerous coworkers have gone home with heat exhaustion, headaches, and vomiting.) The work is also more physically laborious than picking. It consists of picking up totes, moving them around, organizing orders to take out, then taking the orders out to cars, unloading them, and bringing the empty totes and pallet back inside. I enjoy the work minus the sun. Most of the time, I get paired with one or two coworkers who I enjoy working with (because they actually work). Other times, I get stuck in a room full of people who do the bare minimum or play on their phones during downtime instead of prepping orders for the next hour. (Every hour, there’s a “rush” of delivery drivers.) When no one preps, each hour is ten times more stressful.

Other than that, I’m pulled into produce, stocking, and topstocking. Topstocking is my favorite job to do, since it’s the most easy on the body (although a lot of other people say climbing up and down the ladder is difficult for them). All it is is scanning items from topstock, bringing what I can down onto the shelves, and organizing topstock so it’s easy to find stuff later on. I get hyper-focused, and time flies by. Being my favorite job, it also happens to be the one I’m least able to do. Only when we have enough people on literally every other job (which rarely happens) can I topstock all day.

Walmart as a Workplace

It hasn’t been outstanding, but it also hasn’t been terrible. I’ve met some great coworkers. Work doesn’t drag by as slowly as it could. Overall, I’d say my experience is slightly above neutral. The work itself isn’t bad. It can be boring or tedious at times, but great coworkers and managers make time pass more quickly. It’s definitely a lot more sustainable of a job than fast food. (Hey, at least they’re not stealing your money here.)

However, I definitely feel more like a number. I feel disposable and unimportant—something that took a while to get used to. People don’t care if you’re there. Work is based on hours, not performance. No one’s looking up to me. Most of the time, I feel like a piece of machinery rather than an individual and a necessary part of a team. Disposable. Neither wanted nor discarded. But being just a number does have its perks. For one, I don’t have nearly as much responsibility and stress as I did at Pizza Hut. I just clock in and out, and managers take care of the rest. I get to have peace of mind, which means I can concentrate on my job and work without worrying that everything’s about to fall apart if I don’t keep tabs on it all.

Workplace Appreciation

I do feel like less of a number and more of a part of a team, now that I’ve been here half a year. People are friendly. I’m asked for advice from new associates. Managers actually recognize talent and hard work here, and they make you feel appreciated.

I’m grateful for my managers. It’s such a different workplace environment with the kind of people they are. Unlike at Pizza Hut, they’re responsible (for the most part), treat you like a person with worth, and are reasonable and fair. Justice is promoted. I don’t have to worry that they’re doing shady stuff in order to benefit themselves. There are set systems in place. Should anything arise, I have a peace of mind knowing that things will be handled in a straightforward, clear manner.

Managers and coworkers both seem to like me. I’m complimented on my hard work often, and our new TL (mid-level manager) told me that I’m a great associate, and he’s happy to have worked with me. I get called a number of names. From managers: “Little Missy” and “Sassy McSasserson.” From coworkers: “Hercules,” “Tokyo Drift,” and “Xena.” There’s others, but I can’t remember them all. (Keep in mind that most of these are used entirely jokingly.)

I was the “Happy to Help” associate for August! (Apparently the managers vote every month based on our attendance and attitude.) When our PL (HR person basically) walked me to the office in the backroom, I began wondering what I’d done wrong. You can imagine my surprise and relief when he handed me a box to open, only to reveal a trophy depicting my name on it. He then proceeded to lead me back out onto the salesfloor to take a picture. I’m still waiting for them to post it on Facebook so I can see what they wrote about me and admire how short I look in the picture, because I’m short, and the PL is really tall. 😆

Work Benefits

Walmart offers a whole bunch of benefits that Pizza Hut didn’t. Besides affordable insurance, they have both paid and unpaid breaks, a good system for calling out sick, paid time off, and free bakery items in the break room. Well, that last one only happens every so often. However, it’s nice to go to the break room and find a small treat. (It’s whenever the container gets broken in the freezer. They can’t sell the item anymore, but it’s also not bad, so we get to eat it.) Oh, and don’t forget guaranteed hours and a set schedule. No more staying up late at night begging managers to get the schedule out for the next day.

Pharmacy

I’m moving to pharmacy this month. I hadn’t planned on transferring this soon, wanting to wait until I’d moved (uh, into an apartment…we’ll get to that soon), but the job was kind of sprung upon me—in the nicest way possible of course.

Lead pharmacy tech comes into the break room, about to leave work. Sees me. The following questions occur rapidly:

“Do you have your high school diploma? Are you 18? Are you out of school? Do you work full time? Do you want to work in pharmacy?”

I answered yes to all, explaining that pharmacy was actually what I’d originally applied for, but they’d hired me for OPD instead. The lead tech gave me his phone number then left, saying he’d send me the instructions to get the job.

I’ve since gotten my pharmacy technician license. I sent my application to the Arkansas State Board of Pharmacy, got fingerprinted (for my criminal background check) at some DIY-looking gym in the middle of a patch of woods, and am getting my pharmacy “smock” soon. Latest I heard, I’m starting next week. Pay is the same as OPD. Disappointed at that aspect but that’s just what it is, and maybe I’ll like the work better.

Car

I wrote about it in my newsletter, but I don’t think I ever addressed it here. I got a car from my manager, Joe, at Pizza Hut. The car is older than me. Although it’s taken me to and from work without major problems, it hasn’t been acting the most reassuringly. It’s stalled out while idling, had trouble starting up, and done tiny weird noises at random times. I’ve done some repairs on it (well, my dad mainly. He helps me a lot with my car, which I’m very thankful for). Also, Joe works on cars as a side hobby, and he’s looked over mine. One part we changed fixed the main problem (stalling). The rest is to be determined. I’ve thought about financing a new car just to get away from the insecurity of driving something that could break down at any moment. I don’t drive that far every day though, and if something happens, I live close enough to work that I could figure something out.

I started driving maybe two years ago. I still don’t enjoy it, but it’s not nearly as anxiety-inducing as it was back then. To be fair, I do drive a tiny car as opposed to the huge truck I learned in, so that makes drive-throughs and Walmart parking lots a ton easier. Other than that, driving comes more naturally to me. I don’t have to remind myself to look both ways or check before merging. One thing still hasn’t changed though: I can’t talk and drive. Or sing and drive. Or listen to anything and drive. I must be fully concentrated. It probably won’t change, but that’s okay. As long as I’m aware of my weaknesses, I can stay safe.

Moving

I got an apartment. Well, I don’t have it yet, but I put down the application fee and deposit, and I’m on the waiting list, currently estimating October or November. (I’m guessing mid November.) I’m really excited about it. While it’s going to be more responsibility and money, I’m looking forward to the freedom. My parents still want me to live with them. They just bought a new house. They’re renovating it, and my mom told me that they’re still going to build the extra room for me that I can have all to myself “when I move back in.” (They haven’t given up hope. Admittedly, it’s very sweet and kind.)

The new house is its own story. I’ve only been there once, but basically they’re ripping out and replacing the flooring, doing stuff with plumbing and electric, and building more rooms and a hallway. Oh, they also moved the entire kitchen from upstairs to downstairs. They’ll also do cosmetic stuff like repainting. It’s a whole big process, and I can’t believe they’re doing it, since it seems scary to tear your new-old house apart to make it look new.

Finances

Since getting a job, I’ve been learning how to make, manage, and keep track of my money. I would say I’m pretty good with finances. My credit score is doing well, and I’ve found the best ways to spend money (getting cash back) and earn interest. I’ve researched a lot and gained a much better understanding of the bigger scope of things. I have yet to do my taxes this next year, but with tax tools online like Turbo Tax, it shouldn’t be that difficult.

I’ve learned to budget. Currently, I don’t have very many bills, but I know when I’m in my own place, I’ll be making a little above what my expenses will be, so it’s best to start good habits early. I try to keep my monthly grocery budget under $35 (about 20 meals). The ideal is $20. So far, so good, and I’ve leaned to cook a lot of things, including chicken—which I was admittedly scared of.

With moving out, I’m wanting to keep my upfront expenses low, while also thinking about the future. I’ve started making lists on the Walmart app with everything I’ll need (groceries, pantry items, cookware, cleaning supplies, etc.). Some things I’ve found I’m willing to compromise quality on, but others, I want things to last long, and I think the investment is worth it. The Walmart app allows you to build grocery lists which automatically calculate the total price. That’s been helpful with budgeting. It’s also helpful in finding the products which are the best deal. Overall, I’m actually really enjoying handling my finances. It gives me a sense of responsibility and accomplishment—especially when I’m able to find the most efficient or cost-effective ways of doing things.

Conclusion

So how am I doing? I’m doing good. I have ups and downs, but so far, everything’s been pretty smooth. I’ve come a long way in the past year, and so much has changed. I’m excited about getting my own place…like, really excited. I’m loving the cooler weather. I thank God especially when the skies are cloudy, and it’s drizzling. Life is good, God is good, I enjoy the people He’s put in my life, and He’s constantly teaching me more. We’ll see how things go. For now…

*vanishes again from the face of the internet*

February 15, 2023February 15, 2023

I Got Scammed

To start off, let me just say that no, no one stole any of my money. I was too smart for that to happen 😉 My scammer left before I could waste any more of his time or energy. So how did I get scammed? I guess you could say I was scammed out of my time and energy. I put in a lot of both before I realized what was happening, and when things ended, I was left with six thousand words on the topic of alcohol abuse and nothing to show for it. Let’s jump in.

The Invitation

I’m on LinkedIn. That’s how my scammer found me. He sent me a very professional-sounding proposal through the messages feature on the platform, along with a basic outline, pay rate, and expectations of the project. Because he was so thorough, I wasn’t as suspicious as I would have been, had I got a message like any other scam offer. My scammer wanted an article:

on the topic of “The Effects of Alcohol Abuse”
7,125 words long
for an audience age 17—45
to be used as for a seminar presentation
informative yet captivating
detailing the history of alcohol, its effects, its chemical makeup, and preventative measures for alcohol abuse

I asked questions to make sure I was capable of writing such an article before proceeding. Each question was met by a thorough answer. Information and help were provided at every turn. The conversation held a professional tone.

The Offer

$1/word. For a 7k word article. Do the math yourself.

The rate is quadruple what most beginner freelancers can get. It’s also something that was too good to pass up, given that I had plenty of time to spare, and my circumstances made it an easy choice. Thus, I accepted the original message and got down to business. I was asked to create the article in the timeframe of three to four weeks. However, I replied that I’d be able to get it done much quicker (one or two weeks instead). As soon as I got all the information I needed, I started researching and got down to business.

Suspicions and Expectations

I knew from the beginning a scam was a big possibility. Getting contacted for a job is rare unless you already have some clients under your belt. Being contracted for a big project by a big company for a high rate is even more suspicious.

So I went in with my suspicions. I knew it was most likely a scam. However, as someone who didn’t have a job (yet), I had plenty of time on my hands. If happened to be a scam, I was fully prepared. Either way, no one was about to get any of my money. I made sure of it. Being told I’d be paid by check, I thoroughly explained how check scams work and then proceeded to talk about my concern with scams and how I was uncomfortable accepting check. I was then assured that no, this was not a scam, and no, I had nothing to worry about. (Spoiler alert: they lied.)

Anyway, I went against my better judgement and accepted the proposal. I knew the risks and was ready to put in a whole lot of work for nothing. If the offer turned out to be real, the pay was too good to pass up. If it didn’t…well, then I benefitted substantially. It would be a free push into the world of freelancing, and it would be a great place to start from. Besides, I wanted the full experience of researching a completely new topic and writing an article on it. My first time freelancing. What could possibly go wrong?

The Article

I started with an outline. Said outline quickly grew into a long, long first draft. By the end of day one, I knew so much about alcohol, I was convinced I’d be able to answer almost any related question. I’d researched almost everything imaginable on the subject. Effects, history, components, addiction—you name it.

Day two, and I’d read way too many stories on Reddit concerning the horrors and technicalities of alcohol abuse. Then some stories about addiction and first-hand accounts of how difficult and different everyone’s experience with it could be. And then some.

Day three, and I was done. I felt like an alcohol expert. I didn’t want to do any more research. This is where I ended the article and finished the first draft at over 6k words.

True Colors Revealed

I took my rough draft and messaged my scammer with the request for a review to make sure we were on the same page. I’d been told the article was for an important event. Thus, (with such a long piece), I wanted to make sure the article covered everything it was supposed to, and that I wasn’t expanding where it wasn’t important. I’d kept things pretty straight-to-the-point. At 1k words less than the intended amount, there was quite some room for improvement.

I got no response. For a couple of days, I brushed it off. It was Christmas; perhaps he was just on holiday. A fresh new article in my hands that no one other than a few of my friends had seen, I kept hoping. However, as Christmas passed, and the New Year rolled around, my hopes went down. I began to let things go. The silence felt intentional. It didn’t look like I’d be getting any pay, and the article (still in the first draft stage) hadn’t been shared with my scammer. It looked like I was on my own.

The Moment of Truth

Days passed. Maybe weeks passed (I don’t know). I forgot about the article and moved on in my head, not wanting to feel the disappointment lingering with the hope that maybe he was just on holiday still.

Then I got a message. On LinkedIn. From a completely different person. The message, however, was completely identical to the one I’d received, asking me to write a 7k-word article on the topic of “the effects of alcohol abuse.” Every singe word matched. Even the typos did. The only difference was that, instead of “alcohol abuse,” there were the words “cigarette abuse.”

I knew immediately that both had been/were scams. The offers were identical, and the messages matched in a way that couldn’t possibly be a coincidence. Just for the fun of it, I asked the second scammer questions. I pushed and pried, telling her about the identical offer I’d received and asked her to explain it. At first, she said she knew my first scammer. He “was on sabbatical.” She was the project manager, and since the first scammer had vanished for the moment, she was contacting me with an update to the project (which, in the first place, you can’t hire someone to write something and then just change the entire topic halfway through).

I kept questioning her. Soon enough, her answers changed. According to her, she didn’t know my first scammer; it was all just a big coincidence, and I should just accept her offer because it was a good opportunity. I confronted her about her lies. I showed her how her logic didn’t work. First, she was defensive. Then aggressive. Then, she vanished.

The whole ordeal over, I laid the article to rest (mentally) and accepted the fact that I’d never be paid for the thousands of words and hours of research I’d just gone through. I’d had my first freelancing experience. Although it wasn’t actually an authentic one, there was a lot to glean from the experience (besides the obvious “don’t accept random suspicious commissions off of LinkedIn”).

Feelings, Regrets, and Consequences

I don’t regret doing it. I think it was a good experience, and as I didn’t have a job at the time, I didn’t have much to lose besides a few days’ worth of time and energy. I’m mad at the scammers, granted. I’m kind of mad at myself for letting them get the best of me. However, I think it was a good learning experience, and at least I got to delve a bit into psychology and the human body (two of my favorite subjects).

In the end, I’m just wondering what the scammers hoped to get out of me. Right off the bat, they knew they weren’t going to get my money; I made that quite clear from the start. They weren’t getting my information, and they weren’t getting any money, so my best guess is that they realized pretty quickly I wasn’t worth their time, and after setting me up to do all the work for nothing, decided to vanish into thin air. Seriously. I can’t even find their profiles anymore.

My key takeaway from this whole thing? If you value your time and energy, don’t waste it on scams. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Don’t squint so much that the red flags look green.

January 4, 2023January 1, 2023

New Year’s Resolutions

I’ve never done New Year’s resolutions, since I’ve never really seen the value in them and am always striving to become a better version of myself anyway (more Christ-like). Plus, they seem kind of cliché. However, for the sake of a blog post and recording my subconscious goals on paper…ah, the screen…we are doing this. And then at the end of the year, we’ll do a review of how well I met these goals.

Grow Closer to God

The obvious goal and the entire goal of my life. Since I want to be able to measure up to this in 365 days, I’m going to put this into a more tangible form. I want to be reaching for God in any and all circumstances. I want to be praising him, pleading for His help, and everything else in between, no matter what’s going on. Knowing Him more (reading His word) will definitely help, as well as just making it a habit to be praying all the time. I’ve already found this increasing in my life because of the new friends I have now. However, I want to see this become permanent and something I do no matter if I have the same encouragement or not.

Work on Relationships

With more privilege comes greater responsibility. Recently, the Lord has blessed me with several new friendships. One of them bloomed super quickly and just took off into the sky like the fireworks in the picture above. The others sprouted more steadily. There’s a lot of potential, and I’m both excited and scared to see where they go.

This year, I want to focus on being a good friend, nurturing the relationships the Lord has blessed me with, and being an encouraging person who causes others glorify the Lord and builds up her friends through profitable speech. I’m not sure how I will measure this at the end of the year. However, I do know the things I want to do more: listen, learn, and love.

For listening, I want to hear what people have to say. Whether that be joyful news, prayer requests, or just a rant, I want to give whoever it is my full attention and just show that I care. (And if I say I’ll pray for them, I really mean it. I pray right then and there and then some afterwards.)

For learning, everyone’s got some wisdom or experiences I can learn from. I love hearing stories from older (or even younger) people and knowing their thoughts and opinions on what happened. Seeing things through other people’s perspectives is so refreshing. I want to take whatever I can learn from these people, follow their examples of Christ-like behavior, and just let the Lord speak through them.

For loving, I want to be more…loving. Each person is different. Every person has their weaknesses and strengths. Learning to love them through their flaws and preferences can be difficult, and I want to get better at letting my own selfishness go in order to serve other people. 1 Corinthians talks about what love is, and it’s a whole lot of things I am naturally not. As a Christian, I want to become more like Jesus and let His light shine through me, but I know this is going to be a difficult one—especially with people I don’t get along well with.

Step up My Social Game

I don’t do the best in social situations. I hate small talk, and my first instinct upon meeting anyone (especially a guy) is to push them away and make them not like me. This is obviously not a good place to be in. I find myself regretting the way I react in the moment when I actually have time to think—especially if the person was going out of their way to be friendly and nice to me, because I really do appreciate it.

Anyway, since I got a job as a CSR (customer service representative) at Pizza Hut, I’m definitely going to be put in many social situations. Everything is pretty casual. During the rush (which is when I’ll be scheduled), there will be many customers to interact with, both in person and on the phones. Outside of the rush, everything is pretty laid back. Some of my coworkers are really friendly, and I hope to get to know them better and maybe even make some acquaintances.

Write and Blog Consistently

Here’s a super measurable one. I want to write consistently. Whether that be in one of my WIP’s, a blog post, a journal, or an essay-like email, as long as it requires a generous measure of brain power and thought, it counts. To be extra strict on myself though, I’m going to say writing at least one word in any of my WIP’s every day. I know this will be a tough one when I’m going through the editing process.

As for the second part of this goal—blog consistently—I’ll be producing a new post every Wednesday. Currently, I have ideas planned out into May, so I’ll need to do some brainstorming before the year is over. If you guys want to see anything in particular, go ahead and write it in the comments!

Oh, and I almost forgot—my newsletter! Since adding in all the new sections and exclusive stuff you don’t see on IG or my blog, I have to put in a substantial amount of extra energy into each email. And since I send out one every week…well, hopefully I can keep up with delivering quality content to your inboxes.

Finish Filling Out My Super Secret Journal

I’m kidding. It’s not super secret, and I don’t even know if I can call it a journal. It’s a Google Docs with parchment/old paper images over each page and fancy fonts for the headings and text. The topic of the journal: my in-depth thoughts on marriage, children, relationships, and the like. It’s mostly so I can write out my opinions and thoughts and inspect them in light of Scripture. I know some girls write letters to their future husbands. I don’t do that, but I have a friend who does. I joked to her that while she’s creating something cute and adorable that she can share with her future husband, I’m making something I can dump on him before marriage to be like, “Are you sure you really want to commit to this?” 😂 Of course, assuming I actually get married. Right now, it’s just a way to self-reflect.

Publish TJB

For explanation, TJB is the abbreviation for my historical fiction WIP, The Jewish Baby. Currently, it’s in the stage of developmental editing, and I hope to get back to it after I finish writing the rough draft of my NaNo WIP. Publishing will be a huge process. Especially since I’m doing everything myself. Finishing up the novel is just the first step. Then, comes marketing. (Ah, the life of an indie author.)

Also, for those of you who don’t know, I have four WIP’s. Three are part of a fantasy/sci-fi/dystopian trilogy. The other one is a standalone historical fiction novel set in WWII. Click on the images below to learn more about the trilogy. (Each is a separate blog post covering the topic indicated on the picture.)

Start Freelancing

On February 6th, I turn 18. That means I can start working as a freelancer and easily sign the contracts that most freelancers use in order to avoid getting scammed like I may have just been. (We’ll save that for another blog post when I figure things out.) I’ve never tried freelancing, so I’m excited to get into it and start working from my computer. If things go well, it will turn into a full-time job. If things go only kind of well, it will be a source of side income. If nothing goes well at all, I’ll try to forget about it. However, freelancing has been a dream of mine for some time now, and I’m hoping it can turn into an alternative for things like working at fast food restaurants. (I’m mainly at Pizza Hut for the experience, but we’ll get into that in a few weeks.) Being able to earn money doing what I love—like writing, research, tech stuff, and design—sounds like a dream, and I’m hoping it doesn’t turn out to be just that.

Keep a More Positive Mindset

I am a natural pessimist and overthinker who is good at making anything sound depressing and hurting her own feelings. I’m also someone who is always pushing to reach the next milestone, attain the next goal, and keep climbing. I have a difficult time seeing the small things and just living in the moment. This year, I want to be more mindful of my thoughts (taking all thoughts captive) and work on just trusting the Lord’s plan. Let’s get a little deep here.

A few months back, I was having a hard time because I couldn’t see where my life was headed. I was extrapolating where I am now into like, five years in the future and getting sad about it. (Ridiculous, I know.) Also feeling like life was a monotonous cycle that would never change. I’m not talking about my writing here. More just my life and if I’d have a family, be independent, etc. It was truly absurd—something most young adults worry about, but it’s a worldly care. I should be trusting God with my future, not falling into hopelessness.

Now I’ve come to a mindset where I’m content waiting on the Lord. I continue the cycle day in and day out. I try to serve the Lord in the small things, like helping my family. If He opens doors and opportunities, that’s great; I’ll go there. But trying not to despair and seeing the joy in the small things—God’s love in everything and everyone around me. His timing is perfect. He has everything planned out already. I just need to live in faith and follow His leading. Easier said than done, but that’s where I’m trying to be. Learning contentment, peace, and rest will all be a big part in this, and I’m already experiencing the joyous rest of laying all my burdens on Him.

Conclusion

I guess these are more goals than resolutions. Depending on the amount of time I have and how much of my life my new job takes up, I may or may not complete some of the bigger ones. However, I think the biggest thing is just growing closer to the Lord. If I don’t accomplish much in the world’s sense, it doesn’t matter if I’m in a better place with God. Our relationship matters above all else. Everything I’m going through now is to draw me closer to Him and to help others to do the same, so I don’t really care if I get X amount of books published in X amount of years.

But Granny, I do know you want me to publish The Jewish Baby, so I will try to do that. I will try to make sure you aren’t waiting that much longer for a real copy. There’s lots of rewriting I need to do.

December 28, 2022December 27, 2022

New Things I’ve Done This Year

So much has happened this past year, and I’m so grateful for everything the Lord has given and taken away, as well as for how much He has allowed me to grow. I’ve had so many new experiences. Some of them were exhilarating, some of them nerve-racking, and some of them heartwarming. This year, I…

…wrote a resume and cover letter

I actually wrote multiple cover letters for a variety of jobs. These ranged from editing, to website design, to all kinds of writing positions. Spoiler alert: I got none of them. I did get interviewed for several, however. One woman (the owner of a clothing store in Boulder, CO) even told me she would hire me for a social media manager/transition role in November, but then she never got back to me, so I was a little disappointed. However, I saw it as the Lord’s way of closing a door and telling me He had other things in mind.

…did job interviews

I did an interview over the phone that went well (although I didn’t end up getting the job). I did a video interview that went terribly. (There were awkward pauses, and my mind went blank at all the wrong times.) I had an in-person interview, where the guy who was interviewing me constantly got distracted because it was rush hour, and people wanted pizzas. Yes, that is the job I have now. There wasn’t much “interview” involved. I didn’t answer one of the questions how I would have, had I really cared about getting the position (I’ll tell you guys about it in a future blog post), but then again, fast food restaurants will pretty much hire anyone.

…got a job

I got a job at Pizza Hut. The hours are flexible, pay isn’t great, but I hope to gain experience and learn new stuff there. My training begins today, and my work hours will be decided in the future. Even the role isn’t very clear. It might be customer service, it could be making pizzas, or it could be a mixture. I’ll tell you about everything in more depth in a later blog post.

…got a phone

I got my first phone in October. (Or was it November?) I’m so grateful for it, as it has allowed me to have more independence both physically and on the internet. Getting a phone made doing many things way easier. It’s been so helpful to me both personally and in relation to my writing journey, and the connections I’ve made I hope will last for many years to come.

…got a driver's license

It was nerve-wracking. It was not fun. I still don’t like driving. However, yes, I do have a driver’s license, and yes, I know how to drive. I’m not the best of it and have terrible anxiety on crowded roads, but I have a driver’s license for ID and emergencies…and if my family wants me to drive them somewhere that doesn’t have a thousand other vehicles around.

(You can read a more in depth blog post about getting my license here.)

…joined a writer community

I joined a writing community…and then left. It was a great experience! I got to see what other young, Christian writers are doing, and I got to meet some people I still keep in touch with to this day. (Okay, it’s only been a few months, but it feels like I’ve known Jessica for a lot longer.) I’m so thankful I got that opportunity, and while I don’t plan on returning, it taught me a lot and allowed me to meet two people I’m very grateful for.

(If you want to read a more in depth post about my experience with the writing community, you can find it here.)

…made new friends for the first time in many years

I spent almost all of my teen years on the road without any constant in-person relationships. There was one period where we traveled with some friends, but we’d known them for years earlier. Now, (almost 18), I live in a house with my family and still don’t have any (constant) in-person relationships. I was also saved right before we started traveling. That’s not a very important note, but it’s something to consider, because it changed the way I view relationships and just life in general. Anyway…

I made new friends this year! I’ve gotten to experience new relationships as a Christian, learning to interact with new connections on my own, while using my own discernment and (not) social skills. Hehe. I’m still learning; it all feels new, especially with the fact that these are online-only relationships, but—I can’t even explain how it feels. Being able to encourage and be encouraged by fellow believers, getting to learn from other people who live in other parts of the world, hearing their stories, and listening to the way they view things—it’s…heartwarming, I guess? That doesn’t even begin to explain it. There’s something on a spiritual level that connects all of the different members of Christ’s church, and being able to meet these people and talk to them is such a privilege. Being able to revel in Christ’s love for us together, even though we just met…so amazing!

All right, the happy rant is over. You may move on XD

…did Inktober

I didn’t know what Inktober was until just right before it began. Anyway, it’s a drawing challenge, where you try to draw something for all 31 days of October. The rules aren’t strict, and it’s mainly something you just do for fun, and that’s exactly what it was—fun. I got to explore different realms of digital art I hadn’t before. I also discovered that I love the spray paint brush on MS Paint 3D. All in all though, it was a pretty relaxed challenge, and I came out with some pretty cool pieces in the end.

(If you want to read the in depth blog post about Inktober, it’s here.)

…did NaNoWriMo

NaNoWriMo…I don’t even know where to begin. Unlike Inktober, it was not a relaxing challenge. It was not always fun either. After 31 days of drawing each day, I dropped the digital paintbrush and picked up a pen (okay, my keyboard) and committed to writing an average of almost 2k words a day. It was tedious, and I felt like I wouldn’t be able to make it at times. But having an accountability partner who I could chat with and who was very encouraging throughout made everything a lot easier.

Also, here’s one thing I didn’t mention before: NaNoWriMo really taught me a lot about going through life in general. I’m someone who tends to look at the immediate present, extrapolate that years into the future, and get depressed about the results. But that’s not a good way to look at things. NaNoWriMo forced me to stop being so future oriented. As Adam (the guy I did NaNoWriMo with) told me, you just have to take it one day at a time. And that’s what I did. Instead of thinking “I have to write 50k in one month,” I just focused on the 2k I had to do that one day. Then, I repeated the cycle. One day at a time, and I’d reached 56k by the end of November. I’m still future oriented, but I’ve found a better way of viewing things. Also, just trusting the Lord throughout and knowing he can throw a plot twist at you that no one could have predicted.

So, while I’m glad I took up the challenge and learned a lot from both it and Adam, I don’t plan on doing it again next year.

(The blog post I wrote about NaNoWriMo is here, while the one about how I prepped for the challenge is here.)

…joined Instagram

The writer community I joined (but left) nudged me gently into the world of Instagram. I got to reconnect with a few people, as well as have a starting point for my platform. Right now, I like to share encouraging things I’ve learned from writing, updates about my WIP’s, and general things about my writing life. There’s a whole community of young Christian writers on there. They’re really supportive and encouraging, and it’s great to know that there are other writers out there writing for God’s glory.

…moved into a house

After traveling for years, my family and I moved into a house. There were a variety of reasons we did this, and I’m not going to get into them, but yeah…we live in a house now. It’s a rental. We don’t plan to stay here forever, and things could change, especially with me (the oldest) growing up.

There are pros and cons of having a house versus an RV, but I’m glad we did this. I’ve been able to get a job because of the fact that we’re currently stationary. We’ve also unpacked some things that we weren’t able to have in the RV. One of these things are a sewing machine, and I’m excited to start working on the skirt I bought material and elastic for.

…started blogging seriously

Yep, this very blog you’re on right now. I started it on September 6th, and since then, I’ve been consistently posting every week on Wednesdays. Topics range from writing, to my books, to life as a young adult (or is it old teenager?). Oh, wait, it’s adolescent—though I will be a young adult in less than two months. I like to lump all the categories together as “life as a young Christian writer and creative.” It’s been really fun, and I’m loving the responses I get from you guys 😊

I guess another part of this “blogging seriously” thing is my newsletter. I used to do automatic emails that went out whenever I created a new post. However, I recently switched to writing an actual newsletter. At the top, you get a short snippet of the week’s blog post, as well as a link to the actual post, then there’s usually some updates about my life and writing. After that, there’s usually a sneak peek of what I wrote that week, but it totally depends on what WIP I’m working on, as well as what stage I’m in. Oh, and I sometimes add one or two of my IG posts from the week to the newsletter. People can click on the images to get to the posts and read the caption, even if they don’t have an account. I just added this in like two weeks ago, so we’ll see how long it stays there.

(If you want to get my newsletter and be notified whenever I post, you can sign up at the bottom of this page.)

…got a blogging accountability partner

It wasn’t my idea. I wasn’t auditioning for more friends. However, Micah (who I knew of from my time on Ydubs) came along and started chatting with me on Instagram. I really loved his extroverted, joyful personality and the way he wants to just live for God, so Instagram chatting turned into emailing, and eventually, he offered to become blogging accountability partners. I accepted (even though I’m pretty good at holding myself accountable). We started a Trello board together. We’ve been blogging together for a total of…um, less than a week, but it’s been fun. If you click on Micah’s picture, you’ll be taken to his website, where he talks about writing, shares encouraging stuff, and talks about his favorite food—crackers 😉😂 I’m kidding, Micah. Well, you did write about crackers, but I really admire your love for the Lord. I’ve been reading some of your posts. They’re very encouraging.

Conclusion

So much has changed this year. I feel like I’ve grown a lot both spiritually and mentally, and I attribute it to the new experiences I’ve had this year. Getting to meet people on my own has definitely been a big factor. However, there’s also the fact that I did NaNoWriMo, and then just that the Lord dealt with me a lot on my perspective on growing up. I’m overwhelmingly grateful for what He has done in my life this year. As I go into 2023 (which I kind of don’t even want to say, because we humans decided to split up time into sections and give these sections values), there’s a lot of hope. Lots of hope with some fearful excitement mixed in. I know that the Lord is in control. Thus, I’m going to walk into 2023 courageously, knowing that He’s on my side and leading the way, the entire path already planned out. All I need to do is follow in faith.

December 21, 2022December 20, 2022

Same Interview, The First Year

After stumbling across famous people doing the same interview every year, I decided to steal some of their questions and do an interview of my own—in written form. Some questions are fun, some thought provoking, and others informational. I thought it would be a good way to self reflect, as we are coming to the end of another year. Ready to dive in?

How old are you?

What advice would you give yourself a year from now?

Keep going. You’ve got this, and even if you don’t, God’s got you.

What advice would you give yourself a year ago?

Trust the Lord. You may be confused and lost and hurt, but He’s working everything out for your good.

What's your biggest regret?

Not understanding as much as I do now when I was younger. I know that’s just the way life works, but things could’ve been a lot easier if I’d known more. (In all honesty, I don’t really have regrets. Mistakes are a part of life. Without them, there isn’t any growth.)

What is the biggest thing you've learned?

Trust in God. He has complete control over anything, and I really don’t need to be worrying all the time (not saying I don’t).

How would you define your style in three words?

Comfy, Black, Unusual

What is the most important thing in your life to you right now?

Serving the Lord.

Okay, I know that’s too basic of an answer, so here’s an alternative one: figuring out where my life is headed. I have many things I want to accomplish. I have many things I want to experience. I’m confused and all over the place, but I know God has already planned out my future. I’m just waiting for Him to make it clear what He wants me to pursue. On a more specific note, however, trying to finish my four WIP’s.

How do you define success, and do you think you've reached it?

People usually define success as fame, money, and power. However, that’s not how I see things. For me, success is having an impact on people’s lives—being able to change someone’s life for the better. I don’t think I’ve reached that point yet, and to be honest, I don’t think I ever can or will. At what point will I think it’s enough? God has called me to a lifetime of glorifying him. I think success is when I reach heaven and he tells me, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

What is one thing you're struggling with?

Relationships. Just…what are relationships supposed to be as a Christian? I know we are to serve, love, and uplift one another, but how does that play out in real life? Currently, all of my relationships (outside of my immediate family) are online. It’s a whole new level of challenging. You can’t do things together, be there physically for each other, have in person, real-time conversations, or any of that stuff you normally do to get to know someone. Plus, everyone is different. Learning to love each person individually is a learning curve and sometimes tricky. There’s also a whole layer of stuff I’m not getting to, but yeah…relationships.

Biggest thing to happen to you this year?

So much has happened this year. However, I’ve got to say getting a phone. The internet has allowed me to grow exponentially in my writing and understanding of the outside world, and I’ve gotten to meet people I never would have otherwise. Getting a phone made everything way easier. It’s been so helpful to me both personally and in relation to my writing journey, and the connections I’ve made I hope will last for many years to come.

Do you feel pressure?

Yes, immense pressure. Mostly coming from myself. I’m really pushing myself to be in a specific place (both life and writing wise) by a certain time. I’ve been working on just laying everything in the Lord’s hand and trusting him with the process. However, as a very self motivated and driven person, I often pressure myself to get things done, taking the fun out of things. Again, this is something I’ve been working on. The Lord has been teaching me a lot about this recently, and I’m grateful for the amount of pressure He has lifted off of me.

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

What's your philosphy?

The Lord is writing the world’s story, and everything and everyone is here for a purpose. Glorify Him in everything, and strive to do what you believe He is calling you to do.

What is a place you want to visit?

I’m not big on traveling (says the person who traveled in an RV for years). I’m actually a homebody, and the max “visiting” I like to do is going for day trips to do something out in nature. Thus, my answer is…a hike nearby?

How are you doing?

😃😫😭😜😟😬 Did that sum it up well enough?
Honestly, I don’t know how I’m doing. Stressed and confused are big ones, but there’s also excitement and joy. Life is a journey, and I’m definitely going through it.

What achievement are you proudest of?

I got an editor for my historical fiction book. That’s one of my proudest achievements, but then there’s also the fact that I did NaNoWriMo.

What is one goal you want to reach by next year?

I want to have a steady source of income by this time next year. I’m about 30% sure it will happen, though. Maybe even that’s a stretch.

Favorite memory from this year?

My time with my friend Maya (whom we visit about once a year). I love her. She’s a great friend 😊

December 7, 2022December 7, 2022

I Finished NaNoWriMo

I actually did it! In 23 days, I wrote 50k words of a brand new novel! It was a grueling, tedious process, but in the end, I’m happy with my progress. How was it? Let’s jump right into that.

Day One

For day one, I stayed up the night before writing blog posts and newsletters for the entire month of November. Once the clock struck midnight, I started writing. I was tired, but I managed to get 1.3k in before going to sleep. I finished the rest when I woke up.

I should also explain that I am a high achiever and like to push myself way too much. Thus, I set a goal of 2k words per day, just in case I ended up not being able to write every day. I also told myself I couldn’t count the thousands of words I was putting into my blog, job applications, IG, and emails. (Some of them were super long.) Spoiler alert: I wrote an average of 2k+ per day. I also finished on the 23rd instead of the 30th.

NaNoWriMo Writing

The first two weeks were probably the easiest. Spirits were high, the novelty was still there, and excitement was in the air. Over the course of 14 days, I got about 31k in—not at all bad for a first-time NaNo’er.

Then, the midway slump hit. Day 15 came around, and I was feeling really tired of writing (as opposed to just kind of tired). I was having issues with my outline, and I didn’t feel “into” my story anymore. However, I kept going through it day by day, reminding myself that I just needed 2k.

I Won NaNoWriMo

And then the 23rd rolled around. I never wake up at 5 am. However, morning came, and instead of seeing it was still early and going back to sleep, I decided to get up and write. Might have had something to do with the fact that there was only 3k left to reach my goal.

At first, I wasn’t sure if I’d finish NaNo that day. I’d spent some time posting on my blog and social media, as well as sending out a newsletter, and by dinner, I only had 2k (as opposed to the 3k I’d hoped to achieve). I then debated whether I should sprint to the end or save it for the next day.

I chose to sprint.

I was excited, and I was writing a good scene, so by 9 pm, I’d reached 50k. It didn’t feel real at first. I was only 40% or so through the first draft, so it also didn’t feel right. However, after telling a few people and looking at the 16 chapters I had in Google Docs, I felt somewhat accomplished. Honestly, it was kind of underwhelming. (Plus, there’s an outline situation going on, but we won’t get into that.)

My Experience + Burn Out

First of all, I knew what I was getting into when I jumped into the challenge. I knew it would be grueling, tedious work, and I knew I would probably get burnt out—and I did, to some extent.

However, I didn’t entirely get burnt out. Even though I’d done a more manageable version of NaNo a few months back (1.5k every week day) which made me feel dead afterwards, I didn’t get burnt out like before. Instead, I feel rejuvenated in some sort of way. And you know whom I have to thank for that?

1. The Lord. Obviously. Without Him, I wouldn’t have been able to do this (or anything for that matter).

2. The friend I did NaNoWriMo with. He’s been so encouraging and such a pleasure to talk to, and it made November a lot easier. Adam, if you’re reading this, thank you. I don’t know if I could’ve done as well as I did without you. You made every chunk of writing something to look forward to, and seeing your example of consistency throughout your (much crazier) life made me want to grow in that area…and just your less worried, more positive outlook on things. You’re writing style is awesome👌I can’t wait to see more of it!

3. Jessica (@a.faith.so.strong) and our wonderful email chats. The emails are long and sometimes go into great depth. Most people would be horrified by the amount of questions I ask, but Jessica and I have this in common, so everything works out perfectly. Love you, Jessica! *hugs*

4. The young Christian writer community on Instagram. I know some of you are reading this, so I’ll thank you again. You guys have held me accountable and made every day of NaNo exciting. You have cheered me on and celebrated milestones with me, and on those days when I felt like giving up and going to sleep, I knew I had to update my word count, and it couldn’t look pitiful

5. And of course, my family. They tried to give me as much time as possible for my writing. Even when I was feeling stressed out and grumpy from difficult writing days, they were kind to me and gave me my space. Thank you, guys.

Conclusion

In conclusion, NaNoWriMo was stressful, tedious, and sometimes tiring, but every day was filled with laughter, surprises, and fun. I’m thankful I took up the challenge. However, I don’t plan on attending again.

*remembers every time I told myself I was done writing, and a new book idea popped into my head and nagged me until I wrote it*

If you did NaNoWriMo, how was your experience? Did you reach your goal? Tell me in the comments, because I’d love to hear about it!

November 30, 2022November 30, 2022

Never Have I Ever: Writer Edition

Today is going to be a fun post! After stumbling across Liesl Brunner’s tag challenge post, I decided to do it myself. This is never have I ever—writer edition.

The Rules

Link and thank the blogger who tagged you. Thanks, Liesl! Here’s her post.
Include the graphic somewhere in the post (or make your own!)
Answer the questions truthfully and honestly.
Tag 3 bloggers.

Never have I ever...

...started a novel I didn't finish

Totally. I used to do this a lot, but I’ve gotten better recently. I think I’ve learned to outline and plan ahead (strengthening my concept) before starting to draft. There are at least two handwritten drafts of books I’ve never finished in the trash.

...written a story completely by hand

Those of you who know me know the answer to this one. I didn’t have technology or computers to assist me in my writing until I was 13. I think I wrote six complete stories by hand, and some of these I actually published later on.

...changed tenses midway through a story

Whenever I try to write in first-person present tense, it always turns into past tense. I think this is because I don’t read books written in present tense (though I’d love to).

...not researched anything before starting a story

Yes, especially when I was younger. I just used my imagination and went off writing whatever came to mind. Never mind the fact that nothing sounded realistic.

...changed my protagonist’s name halfway through a draft

I haven’t done this for any main characters, but I’ve done it for side ones. In fact, for The Jewish Baby, I changed a side character’s name after completing the final self edit, because someone had pointed out that two of my characters’ names were very similar.

...written a story in a month or less

Do short stories that are one page long count? Because I’ve done these in a couple of hours for school assignments.

...fallen asleep while writing

Five percent of the time. Whenever I hit a slow part and start trying to think up ideas, I fall asleep. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I write in my bed in the dark. Lucid dreams are cool, guys. I have to admit that mine don’t usually make any sense, and nothing from them ever ends up in the book. Still….

...corrected someone’s grammar irl/online

My brothers. It’s automatic. If you say “much” instead of “many,” it’s almost guaranteed I will correct you. Online, however, I don’t. I know people have pet peeves about this.

...yelled in all-caps at myself in the middle of my novel

What? Who wrote this question? Now I need to go back and figure out who’s crazy enough to do this 😉

...used “I’m writing” as an excuse

No. My family doesn’t take excuses. Writing is a hobby, and chores are priority. However, if I’m given a choice between writing and something else, sometimes I’ll pick writing.

...killed a character that was based on someone I know in real life

Yes. I’m currently working on a book where lots of people die. Since most of my characters are loosely based off of people I know, this has definitely happened a few times

...used pop culture references in a story

I don’t write contemporary (yet, at least), so it’s nearly impossible to incorporate pop culture into my stories. I also prefer not to if possible, just because it could outdate the novel, and I don’t have much pop culture knowledge anyway.

...written between the hours of 1:00 am and 6:00 am

Yes. If I wake up in the middle of the night and have a flash of inspiration, I will write until I’m satisfied I haven’t forgotten anything. Besides, I’m a night owl and have tons of creative energy around night time and when I wake up.

For NaNoWriMo, I stayed up through the AM’s almost every day. I usually went to bed around 12, but on weekends and days we went places, I stayed up anywhere from 1 am to 2 am.

...drank an entire pot of coffee while writing

I don’t like coffee. The end.

...written down dreams to use in a potential novel

Not written them down, but I have used dreams as inspiration for scenes or concepts in my books. One crazy dream actually became the whole premise of my Fire Trials trilogy. Check it out in more depth here.

...published an unedited story on the internet/blog/wattpad

Embarrassing story: I published seven semi-edited books on KDP, effectively ruining my reputation as an author. Sales dropped from 50 to 0 a week pretty quickly. They’re still up there. However, I discourage people from reading them unless they’re prepared to read a book that sounds like it was written by a young teenager (because it was).

...procrastinated schoolwork because I wanted to write

I was homeschooled, and so this was both easy and not looked down on to do. Whenever the flash of inspiration or that perfect scene pops into my head, I have to write it

...typed so long my wrists hurt

I’ve done this writing, crocheting, knitting, and pretty much anything else that involves my hands. I tend not to stop until I’m satisfied with my progress.

...spilled a drink on my laptop while writing

Nooo. My mom would never. In fact, drinks aren’t even allowed on the table when computers are out. Did I mention that I write in my bed? Yeah, and drinks are never allowed in my bed.

...forgotten to save my work/draft

I write on my Kindle (most of the time) with an app that crashes (all the time). I have lost pages of progress due to this. Let me tell you, the feeling of your heart dropping into your stomach is real. I’ve learned to hit “save” every sentence or so.

Edit: I now write on my computer and phone, using apps that are of much better quality. They also have autosave. Autosave is a real lifesaver.

...finished a novel

Yes! And I’m happy about it.

...laughed like an evil villain while writing a scene

In my head. I love putting my characters through things I’d never wish upon a real person. In fact, this is where a lot of my joy in writing comes from. Isn’t it fun to be the lord of an entire world and its subjects?

...cried while writing a scene

I don’t explicitly remember, but I think I have. Once. And only a tear or two.

...created maps of my fictional world

Whenever I know I will mess up my traveling descriptions, I make a map. I don’t want to publish a book just to have a reader tell me the technicalities of what I wrote. (“Earlier, you said that was there. How can these two things be in the same place?” “Wasn’t she supposed to go that way?”)

...researched something shady for a novel

Definitely. Ways to kill people, ways to die from explosions, toxic plants, deadly illnesses—I could go on and on. If I became a suspect for murder, my search history would incriminate me.

Conclusion

I hope you guys enjoyed this (longish) post. What do you think of these questions and answers? Leave your comments down below. As always, happy reading, everyone!

November 16, 2022November 15, 2022

I Joined a Community for Young Writers

I joined a community for young writers…and left. Let’s jump straight into the blog post.

The Young Writer's Workshop

A few months ago, my mom came across an email from The Young Writer’s Workshop, a Christian based course where young writers can learn from published individuals and interact with other writers. The email announced a 2-day event called a summit (literally just a conference), where well-known authors would speak on different writing and Christ related topics. The conference was both online and free, so I attended.

During the summit, there was a special offer: join YWW for only $1 for the first month. The membership normally costs $30+ a month, so the offer was a good deal. I took it.

For that one month, I used YWW to its full advantage. There are all kinds of resources in the content library, and anything you want to know related to books, writing, publishing, and marketing is there. Since I’d previously had a membership to another author website, I knew a lot about writing. However, publishing and marketing in this day and age is a whole new level of information. I gleaned as much as I could from the content library on YWW, and I am very thankful I could get as much as I did out of that website.

YWW Community

Another part of my YWW membership was the community. The community is on a separate platform managed by the YWW people, and it’s basically social media for young writers. I enjoyed my time there. I got to meet so many wonderful people, and I learned so much from other young writers like myself. I even got some help brainstorming ideas as I wrote the second book in my Fire Trials trilogy.

...And Then I Left

After the $1 trial was up, I cancelled my membership. My mom offered to pay for an entire year on the site, but after lots of praying and thinking, I finally decided to leave.

Look, I loved YWW. It has a lot of helpful information and advice, and you can interact with instructors (published authors) there. You can talk to other young writers, get feedback on your work, and help others in their writing journeys.

However, YWW is tailored to young, homeschooled Christians. There are a lot of security measures in place, and they have content warnings for everything. A lot of things like magic and drinking you can’t write about unless you add a content warning to it. Some topics you can’t even post about. Non Christians wouldn’t even think of using restrictions like these.

Honestly, these measures are there to give parents a peace of mind when letting their kids on a social media-like website. I completely understand where YWW is coming from. I’m happy that young Christian kids are able to be socialize in a healthy environment, and it’s good that parents are able to keep their children safe on the internet.

My Reasons

Buuut…(You knew the big but was coming, didn’t you?)…I am 17. I think deeply, and I like to incorporate deep elements into my writing. Some of these elements aren’t light topics, and I understand that a lot of Christians don’t want their young children reading books with darker, more heavy themes.

To put it shortly, my audience is not the people on YDubs. I’m writing for a more general audience—in particular, non Christian teens. (“Those who are not sick have no need of a physician.” See if you can catch my meaning.) YWW is there to help you in your writing process. As I am currently working on a trilogy that deals with a lot of violence, I don’t really fit in. What I can get out of the community is limited. What I can get out of the content library I’ve already watched or read.

If the membership were free or less than $10 a month, I would have stayed. I enjoyed meeting people. I enjoyed helping them with their writing. Staying would have been mostly for the support (they even have a prayer group) and being able to uplift others in their journeys. However, I was not willing to spend—or let my parents spend—money on something I would only use occasionally. My audience is out there. I just have to find them in other places.

As for the support, some YDubbers have stuck with me through email, and I’ve found some people through Instagram. It’s so nice being able to interact with other writers and Christians. Being on YDubs has encouraged me to pursue writing seriously (in hopes of publishing a good book), and I feel a lot more confident in the direction I need to head.

Conclusion

I’m so thankful for the time I spent on YDubs. I got an awesome view into the world of publishing, learned from other writers, and learned more about book marketing through social media. All of this allowed me to figure out the direction I wanted to go in writing. It also allowed me to know how to pursue writing as a career. I just think YDubs wasn’t specifically for me, and if there’s another writing community out there that fits my audience, I’ll definitely try it out.

October 19, 2022December 5, 2022

I’m Doing NaNoWriMo

NaNoWriMo—the national event that writers from all over the world participate in every year. To say it is difficult is an understatement.

For those of you who don’t know, NaNoWriMo is an event held every November. Writers who participate write tons—and by tons, I mean 50k words. It’s a lofty goal, but that doesn’t stop hundreds of thousands of people from joining every year. On average, only 12% of participants actually reach the goal.

This November, I’m doing NaNoWriMo. And I hope to be in that 12%.

What is the prize?

NaNoWriMo is a free event. There are no prizes, but if you reach the 50k, you can tell people you won NaNo. For most, it’s a way of showing yourself you can do it. Consistency, perseverance, and preparation are all key to winning.

Preparing

Writing 50k words in one month is no easy feat, and one doesn’t get there by jumping in plan-less. (If you do, I commend you.) The fact that holiday season begins around this time makes things even more difficult, and some people have to make up for missed days of writing by doing even more when they have the time. So what am I doing to prepare for NaNo?

For starters, I came up with a solid concept and then drafted an outline. The outline has been written in very great detail. That way, writing will be a breeze, and I (hopefully) won’t get stuck on parts wondering what should come next.

Coming up with my concept

When I started, I just had a vague idea what my story would be about. Basically just a theme and setting. I developed my ideas into a concept by using a plot web, which gave me tons of options on which way the story could go. When I’d found the “plot web path” I wanted to use, I put away the web and got to work on developing ideas for my story.

Outlining

Let me start out by saying that I’m a discovery writer. I have never made a complete outline in my life, and for the past few books, here’s how my writing process looked:

Create enough outline for a chapter or two
Write
Get stuck
Come up with more ideas and add to my outline
Keep writing

And repeat. This process wasn’t the most efficient. I did come up with amazing ideas this way, but I ran into a lot of issues with plot cohesiveness and plot holes. NaNo pretty much forced me to write an entire outline (for an entire book), and you know what? I’m actually not mad about it.

Resources

To start outlining, I began with the Save the Cat! Beat Sheet. This is where I came up with the big plot points and added in major characters. However, this was just the beginning.

Next, I used the Katytastic’s 3 Act/9 Block/27 Chapter Outline. I transported everything from the first outline to this one, then I added in more details and plot points. I didn’t stick super close to the prompts. This allowed me to enjoy the process as I added as much as I could to the chart.

Lastly, I copied everything from the last outline to a blank document. From here, I added in even more (yes, maybe I’m a little extreme), and kept adding until it looked like I had around 25 chapters. Obviously, I can’t really know until I write the entire book. I’m aiming for a 90k novel, and as I want my NaNoWriMo project to be the third book in The Fire Trials, it kind of has to be precise.

Strategy

November is a busy month. Furthermore, that’s also when my personal life will be more hectic than normal. I probably won’t be able to write in the day on weekends, and if I end up getting a job, neither will I be able to do so on week days. Thus, my strategy is to stay up every night writing until I have my desired word count. I’m a night owl, and night time is usually when my creative energy peaks, so this actually isn’t a bad idea. I’m just hoping I won’t be physically exhausted from what I did in the day time.

Oh, and the other part of my strategy: accountability. Honestly, I’m pretty good at keeping myself accountable, but for NaNo, I’m going to be checking in with a friend who also hopes to reach the 50k mark. It’s more for the encouragement, really.

Expectations

So, how far do I really expect to get? I’d love to win NaNo, but in reality, I’ll probably only get 40k words. If I don’t win, I won’t be sad (maybe just a little disappointed). I’ve never done something like this before, and even if I don’t get to 50k, I’ll still have other achievements to be proud of.

Making an entire outline for an entire book—in great detail
Writing more than I ever have in one month
Finishing (part of) a first draft more quickly than I ever have before
Having half a novel in my hands—I mean, computer
Knowing I had the perseverance and consistency to even attempt this challenge

I’m excited to see how NaNo goes, and I’m hoping to reach 50k. If you’re doing NaNo this year and still haven’t prepared, there’s still a week and a half left. *little nudge*

As for me, I think I’m prepared. We’ll see how everything goes, and at the end of it all, I’ll update you on how it went. Happy reading, everyone!

September 6, 2022September 29, 2022

Introduction: The Fire Trials Series

Some of you may have already heard about this, and some of you may have not. Since I’ve been talking about this WIP for some time, I think it’s time for me to do a formal introduction. Everyone, meet The Fire Trials trilogy.

Series Blurb (temporary)

A City….

Firefuge was built by our ruler, Lucivius, to save us from the fires that ravaged the land decades ago. With tall, stone walls and technology Lucivius invented to keep our air pure, Firefuge is impenetrable. It has become a refuge for those of us the fires left living. In here, you are safe.

A Competition…

A competition known as the Fire Trials is held every decade, and youths ages sixteen through twenty-five are required to participate. The Trials root out the weakly and less intelligent beings and make sure future generations will be strong, smart, and healthy. At first, it was a way to reclaim land for our city, but eventually, it became a battle for life, fame, and wealth. Every Trials, teenagers and young adults fight to be the only one standing. To do that, you must triumph over nature, your peers, and the fires. If you are the only one, you don’t have anyone to split the prize with.

The Outcasts…

The Regents are the outcasts—not because of anything they did, but rather because their parents were traitors. Orphaned as children and adopted by the orphanage, the Regents train alongside everyone else in preparation for the Trials. They face unjust prejudices. As a result, Regents are at a disadvantage when it comes to…well, everything.

I am Eire Regent. This year, I am sixteen and the youngest participant in the Trials.

Genre: Sci-fi, fantasy, dystopian

As you can probably tell, this is going to be a trilogy. I plan to release all three books around the same time in three or four years. It could be sooner, though. Since some of the contents in this series are gory and violent (for a good purpose), I’m aiming this toward a slightly more mature audience. I’m thinking right above middle grade or below YA.

Age range: 12—16

I hope you guys liked this blog post. If you have any questions or suggestions, feel free to contact me. I will be releasing updates on my WIPS in the future, so stay tuned by subscribing to my email list at the bottom of this page. Happy reading, everyone!

September 6, 2022September 8, 2022

Becoming a Self-Published Author

The Origins

For as long as I can remember, I’ve loved writing. When I was younger, I always had a notebook that I would fill with stories. Once one was used up, I’d send it to a family member and move on to the next.

My stories were usually based off of a picture I saw, a book I’d read, or a thought I’d had. To make them come to life even more, I would embellish them with drawings or stickers. My tales, characters, and settings varied drastically by notebook, but no matter where a story had originated from, it was always imaginative. Think straight out of a dream. Here are two short examples.

Panda Playground

Once, a family member gifted me a sheet of puffy panda stickers, so I wrote a story about a panda. It was in a Hello Kitty notebook. I think she may have been involved in the story as a result, but I can’t quite remember. However, I do vividly recall a page where I drew a panda playground and stuck panda stickers all over it.

Cat and Fish Bone

Another time, a family member gave me a blue notebook with a cat and fish skeleton on each page. Most people would think the cat ate the fish and make a story out of that, but I was maybe eight years old. That wasn’t even on my agenda. Instead, my brilliant mind decided the cat should get married to the fish skeleton (which I called Fish Bone), and they would have abnormal children. I think all their girl children were cats, and all the boys were fish skeletons.

Writing Evolution

Growing up, I was an avid collector of pencils and pens. Every Friday, I was allowed to choose a prize for finishing a week of school. Pencils were my go-to for a while. I used them for everything. Eventually, I discovered that I preferred pens, and the pencils became a decoration for my desk. I think most of my early writing years were spent using notebooks and pens.

When I was around twelve years old, I decided that I wanted to become an author when I was older. With that intention in mind, I created a writing binder. The binder was pink (not sure why—I don’t like pink) and filled with college-ruled papers. Every day, I would open up the binder, take out a few sheets, and either edit or add to a story. My writing started off as crazy figments of imagination, but over time, it evolved into more put-together, realistic plots. Most of the stories I’ve published have their beginnings in that binder.

Technology

Technology was a game changer. My family had a Kindle we shared and almost never used. When I was allowed to use a writing app on it, I discovered how much easier things could be. It was love at first use. I began transferring all my pre-existing books from my binder onto the Kindle, and from there, I edited. It was amazing how easily I could erase and add words without having to rewrite an entire page by hand. A new world of endless opportunities had just opened up for me. Writing had never been easier.

Self-Publishing

That’s when I seriously began thinking about publishing my books. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing, but my mom helped me set up an email, bank account, and KDP (Amazon self-publishing) account anyway. My dad found me a website host. From there, I designed my website and released six books. My parents graciously allowed me to figure out things on my own, and I am very thankful for that. I learn best through trial and error, and these years were so helpful for me. Even though I regret what came out of that time, God used it to teach me so much I wouldn’t have learned otherwise.

My biggest mistake was probably releasing semi-edited stories with plots I now cringe to think about. My mom warned me to edit more first, but I didn’t listen, and sales dropped from a couple a week to nothing. I’ve seriously contemplated taking half of my books down. However, I don’t want to forget where I’ve come from and how much I’ve grown since becoming an author, and I think others should get to see that as well.

September 6, 2022September 8, 2022

Manifesto

Glorify God in everything

As a Christian, I believe my aim in life is to bring glory to my creator. God has given me the gift of writing. He’s given it to me for a purpose, so I am going to use it for him. Even if I am just writing for myself (say, a journal), I want my words to praise my heavenly father.

Encourage and entertain

I want to bring joy to others. I want them to read what I write and feel encouraged and uplifted afterwards. My gift is not just for me; it is for others. Whether it encourages or entertains people, all that matters to me is that other people benefit from what I am able to give. God calls us (as his church) to help, uplift, and love one another, and I hope my writing can do that for other people.

Draw others to God

There are people out there who don’t believe what I believe, and that’s fine. However, I will do my best to share the truth through my writing. I will use it to entrance and entice other people, hopefully leading them to see the bigger picture and the deeper meanings hidden inside. God is in control of everything. I will write what I believe he wants me to write, and he can use it how he wills. One thing I want to make sure I never do is turn people off from the gospel by being judgmental or unloving. Jesus gave me the ultimate gift of love, and that’s something I want to share with others—not hate.

Make a lasting impact

Life on earth is temporary. I will only live for a certain amount of time. I want my works to live on even when I’m gone, continuing to fulfill the purpose I’ve intended them to. I want people to remember not me, but what I stood for and whom I believed in. My life is a testimony of God’s love and faithfulness. I want people to remember that, and I want them to turn to God because of it.